Grave cleaning videos spark fascination and outrage on the Internet

In a social media landscape often dominated by playful dances and aesthetic montages, one surprising trend remains unbroken: historical grave cleaning.

On social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and Reddit, users have created online communities around gravesite cleaning. Audiences are fascinated by this trend – some revel in the paranormal, others search for long-lost ancestors, and many simply enjoy the satisfying act of a deep clean.

As content creators visit cemeteries and document their restorations, resulting in millions of views, the internet remains divided – some see the trend as a helpful cleanup of 100 years of dirt, while others see it as exploiting gravesites without proper care or respect and possibly breaking laws or the accelerated wear and tear of monuments.

The practice has come under particular criticism in recent weeks. Stacey Habecker, known online as “The Clean Girl,” caused a lot of controversy with her optimistic and vibrant approach to grave cleaning.

In a TikTok video that has nearly 140 million views, Habecker, who appears in the same pink and black outfit and her hair in pigtails in every video, is shown throwing a pink ball into the cemetery and cleaning the grave, in near which he landed. She then uses a leaf blower, a vacuum cleaner, and her own commercial pink cleaning solution on the headstone and surrounding areas – which experts say could not only damage the stone, but corrode it altogether. She ends the video by revealing the name of the deceased.

Many commenters described having “mixed feelings” about the video, noting that it contained elements that seemed to simultaneously honor and disrespect the grave.

Although it's unclear what's contained in the “bright, fun, foaming cleaning spray” as described on the product's website, Jason Church, director of technical services at the National Center for Preservation Technology and Training, warned that harsh chemicals and power tools weaken and gravestone layers erode. Aside from some approved stone cleaners and tools, many substances can do more harm than good to graves.

“Yes, this rock will clean immediately, but realistically what you've done is probably 50 to 75 years' worth of natural weathering in an instant,” Church told NBC News.

Despite the outcry of comments, reaction videos and expert advice, The Clean Girl continued to create and re-upload grave-cleaning videos to YouTube, Instagram and TikTok – reaching hundreds of millions of views across their platforms. Habecker has not publicly responded to the controversy or responded to a request for comment.

“You have no idea what the meaning or symbolism is of the things at the grave that you touch, rearrange and aggressively, disrespectfully clean,” Andra Berghoff said in a reaction video on TikTok, referring to the removal of flowers and personal items the graves.

In some cultures, grave cleaning is part of family duty and tradition, such as Día de los Muertos in Mexican and Central American culture. Every year before and on November 1st, many families go to the graves of their loved ones to clean their memorials.

Many also question whether Habecker had permission from the family or the gravesite's caretaker, which Church said was non-negotiable. Many cemeteries, he added, may require training or advise the public to stay away from certain historic graves.

In several states, laws and regulations allow cemetery owners to limit access to non-family members and set specific access times to prevent nighttime trespassing. Parties could also be held responsible for reckless practices that result in damage to the graves.

“There is no Good Samaritan rule when it comes to preservation,” Church said, adding that many graves are owned by dioceses, foundations or counties, or are family-owned. “We can’t just clean something because we felt it needed to be done.”

That, many creators say, is far from an accurate representation of the broader grave-cleaning community, which users say ideally serves to inform, educate and equip volunteer grave-cleaners with the resources necessary to safely preserve gravestones – and history. are required.

For members like Justin Frost, the hobby of grave cleaning was a natural outgrowth of a desire to learn more about his family history.

But Frost's search for his ancestors didn't take him very far – just ten minutes away at the local cemetery, where he learned that many of his elders were buried in unkempt and overgrown graves.

“It was pretty obvious that no one was going there and taking care of these people’s gravestones,” Frost said in an interview.

Determined to restore his family's gravesite, Frost delved into online research and took a class to learn how to clean and restore gravestones. This sparked a love for historic preservation, which he shares with nearly 150,000 TikTok followers.

“There is absolutely no substitute for hands-on training,” he said, emphasizing the importance of entering practice cautiously. “Some things you can’t learn by watching a video, and it’s always better to be there and do it with someone who can supervise.”

Since starting in 2017, Frost continues to exercise great caution when cleaning graves. Because of his knowledge, he was given permission to work on gravestones in his town cemetery – but he adds that to be on the safe side, he has insurance to protect him from accidental damage.

For his account, Past Preservations, Frost cleans gravesites while telling parts of the story of the deceased. Many commenters, Frost said, have been able to locate ancestors through the stories he shares online — even his own wife, who was linked to a distant relative based on the content.

“Many of these people died at a time when they didn’t get an obituary,” he said. “So this is kind of my little obituary for her.”

For Frost, who works a full-time job, the hobby has “transformed” him. In his social media bio, he shares safe products, resources, and training so that his followers can also join in the volunteer efforts.

“It’s definitely my Zen,” he said. “It calms me down and I really enjoy sharing it with other people because it’s a passion of mine.”

And he is far from alone in this passion – surrounded by other content creators and millions of fascinated viewers worldwide.

Allyson Stephenson, also known as the “Crazy Cemetery Lady” by her nearly 50,000 TikTok followers, discovered the practice through social media and used it as an outlet to stay “busy and focused.” Similar to Frost, she attended several in-person workshops and conducted extensive research before beginning the historical cleanup.

“I always tell people, especially when I live my life, that it took over 100 years for this to get dirty. It will take some time to get it clean,” she said, explaining that safe products like D/2 Biological Solution work for six months and don't provide the instant shine that unsafe cleaners might provide.

Stephenson, who cleaned over 2,000 headstones in four summers, said her passion for genealogy drives her love of preservation.

“I’m not in it for the fame, fortune and anything else. “My job is to preserve the headstones, make sure they are there for the next few generations and tell their stories,” Stephenson said in a phone call.

And through social media, Stephenson said, the grave cleaning community has only grown – allowing others to participate and continue to preserve history, one gravestone at a time.

“TikTok has given me a platform to share the stories behind the gravestones and connect with a community who are as interested in history as I am,” she said. “The comments and interactions are incredibly rewarding; People often share their own discoveries or ask questions, which helps create a space for learning and preservation.”

Many organizations – such as the National Center for Preservation Technology and Training – train volunteers and organize events dedicated solely to gravesite restoration. Church, Frost and Stephenson all encourage interested viewers to find local classes and get some training before attempting to restore a stone, and to do so with the right intention.

In this way, many say, cemeteries not only remain respectful places of rest, but historical figures – whether known or unknown to the masses – can continue to be honored in some small way.

“If that headstone is gone, then they’re gone,” Stephenson said. “They have disappeared from time. It's as if they never existed.

“The more people out there doing the right things and using the right materials can save even more cemeteries from decay,” she added.