Viral TikTok sparks discussions about health boundaries

A new mother's heartfelt conversation with her baby's grandmother asking her not to kiss her newborn has gone viral on TikTok – and it's easy to see why.

The video has amassed 8.7 million views as more parents take proactive measures to protect their babies' fragile immune systems, especially during cold and flu season. Rising cases of whooping cough and walking pneumonia increase the urgency as parents become increasingly aware of how vulnerable infants can be to seasonal viruses and respiratory infections.

Her message — advocating for health-focused boundaries, even if that means saying “no” to loved ones — underscores a growing trend in parenting. As health care provider Jessica Acciacca reminds us, “Parents have the right to make this request to protect their vulnerable little ones, even if it is difficult for their loved ones to understand.”

Why setting boundaries is so important for new parents

The clip sparked conversations among parents who reflected their own experiences in this mother's words. New parents make decisions like these out of deep love and responsibility, especially when it comes to the vulnerable first months.

Many health care providers, like pediatrician Shannon Glenn-Otto of Johns Hopkins All Children's Hospital, suggest that families limit newborns' contact with visitors during the first two or three months. During this time, babies have not yet developed full immunity to bacteria and viruses, making them more susceptible to serious infections. Their blood-brain barrier, which helps prevent pathogens from entering the brain, is still mating, and they have not received key vaccinations against diseases like COVID and the flu, which are only given after six months.

Videos like this show that it's okay to prioritize health — even if that means setting boundaries that are difficult for others to understand.

@devonstephen, how sweet is my mother, she obviously actively listens and calmly says, “Okay.” 🥺 blessed with loving parents. #Boundaries #Postpartum #Grandparents #Comedy #First Mom #Oldest Daughter ♬ Original Sound – Developer

Why “no-kiss” rules are on the rise

Stories like these illustrate a shift in the way parents approach family dynamics. Today, with the support of health experts, parents are more confident about setting limits to prevent exposure to viruses that can be particularly harmful to infants.

Pediatricians note that newborns have sensitive immune systems, making them more susceptible to complications from illnesses that adults may not consider serious. Setting these boundaries isn't about distancing the family – it's about protecting what matters most.

How to set boundaries with family and friends: a conversation framework for new mothers

Setting these boundaries with family can be difficult, but here is a simple approach that keeps the conversation respectful and clear.

1. Lead with love
   Start by acknowledging their love and enthusiasm for the baby. This creates a warm, positive tone.
   • “We are so grateful for all the love you have [baby’s name]. It really means so much to us!”
2. Explain why
   Give a brief, compassionate explanation. It's about ensuring your baby's safety, not about rejecting affection.
   • “We are particularly careful because [baby’s name]“The immune system is still developing, and even a minor illness can be serious.”
3. Ask the question plain and simple
   Formulate your request politely and clearly without hesitation.
   • “To keep [baby’s name] To be safe, we ask everyone to refrain from kissing and wash their hands before holding them.”
4. Acknowledge how they might be feeling
   Show empathy and let them know that you understand that it may feel different.
   • “I know this may feel a little unusual, especially when things were different in our childhood, but this is what feels right to us.”
5. Offer other ways to show love
   Suggest other meaningful ways to connect that will keep everyone healthy.
   • “We would be happy to have a relationship with you [baby’s name] by holding them or chatting with them. These interactions mean so much to us!”
6. Encourage special engagement
   Help them feel connected by suggesting specific activities they can enjoy together.
   • “It would be very special if you could read a favorite story or sing a lullaby. These moments help [baby’s name] I feel close to you.”
7. End with thanks and acknowledgment
   Thank them for their understanding and remind them of their importance in your child's life.
   • “Thank you for supporting us in whatever feels best [baby’s name] at the moment. We feel lucky to have you in their lives.”

Setting boundaries can be difficult, but these simple steps will help keep things compassionate and clear – because at the end of the day, it's all about keeping your family healthy and happy.